…endlessly waiting to see your light

I rage against the clock
as the slow hands of time whittle the future away
this seems an endless battle and I am slowly losing my mind
slowly losing myself, losing my longing
longing for a moment, for a minute, an hour, a day
now a seemingly futile desire
in the chaos of it all, the past is slowly forgotten
an echo, a memory, faded and frayed
my grip on life unravelling
under the still gaze of the clock and it’s cold, indifferent face
the future is now an illusion, a mirage crafted to tempt
dreams now faded like rainbows
yet I still cannot acknowledge their fragile nature
or the unseen shadows that carried them gently away
and all the while I am waiting
for a tomorrow that will never come
I am searching for the truth in every aching dawn
as the relentless ebbing tide drags the sand from beneath my feet
just as my longing for a moment, a minute, an hour, a day
whittles that moment away
always waiting for the night, like a moth to a flame, I am captured
entranced by its ever-changing moods
and drawn to the moon’s silent song as it calls to me over and over
night music, nocturnes for the soul
I still walk the shore in the shallow waves
and I think suddenly of you
I wonder if somewhere, you are feeling this too
do you yearn for something more…
something just out of reach?
are you content with what you have …
with who you are?
do you feel the pull of the tides …
or do they pass by unnoticed?
I still meet you in my dreams, our secret nocturnal romance
night whispers love letters in the dark
light blooming from the shadows, what was once veiled, unveiled
I am addicted to the night, endlessly waiting to see your light
the aching tides of my heart ebb and flow and ebb and flow
until finally they fall into silence
when once more I am drowning
in the reality of the dawning
© Ann Bagnall