…the heart cannot un-hear them

Could somebody please shadow the sun
and cover the crowds of brilliant stars
that shine so bright, even in the darkest night?
for I am languishing in the rivers of mourning
that are flowing like razors through my soul
and their glassy waters already intensify
the many colours of my pain
could the days and the nights and the seasons
maybe just blend for a little while?
and try to live in some kind of harmony
instead of the constant shifts from dark to light
and cold to warm, and in between
beginnings and endings, night and day
blossoms and leaves, fields of grass and snow
birdsong and wind song, emptiness and ice
these contrasting shifts, create their own songs
songs of joy and songs of loss
and the heart cannot un-hear them
my body betrays me aching to embrace the beauty
even in desolation I can’t turn myself away
and for this indulgence, my heart will always pay
I return to the memories made in the moments
the ones that tie me to a time and a place
oh how I wish I had the knowledge
a magic wand or a cloak of invisibility
light as a feather and as wide as the sea
that I could use to cover all of the things
the places the sounds that bring you back to me
but my heart is always stronger than me
and understands, that my pain is part of the journey
and that loss is eternally connected to love
and that love should always be free
© Ann Bagnall