…we cannot see?

‘Do stars have shadows we cannot see?’
my shadows form scars upon my skin invisible in the light
‘an illusion of the night?’
but alone in the dark they come to life
‘like the woods in my heart
deep and dark keeping my secrets?’
there is a man whose face I have never seen
only his shifting form ever appears to me
a night scavenger searching for souls
‘but he never comes for me’
there is a woman whose shadow casts a wide berth
too wide for such a fragile frame
reflective of her heavy burdens
‘but she never shows her pain to me’
my own shadow is an enigma, its secrets unrevealed
it remains unseen, detached as if not a part of me
my own adversary, watching, waiting
but for what ‘it never reveals to me’
like a stranger, it follows me everywhere
haunting my dreams and my memories
just a movement ‘in my peripheral vision’
gone when I turn my gaze
it bleeds my secrets into the light
‘all the pain I have buried’
and the love I have lost
the sheer weight of all my regrets, laid bare for all to see
the distance I put between us was never far enough away
and ‘the things I left behind’
in the silence, still speak loudly to me
my past and present intertwined
‘all I ever had all I ever lost’
an ethereal haunting that follows me everywhere
whispering softly in my ear
calling me back to the distant past
to the shadow of who I used to be
‘our past does not define us’
to that dark place holding all my secrets
from which I can never be free
‘even in darkness there is light’
this part of me that slowly reveals the void
the darkness that lives inside of me
‘our secrets and fears can be our strength’
my very essence has been lost in abandoning my history
my soul is an empty shell
but she echoes sweet nothings to me
‘become who you were meant to be’
© Ann Bagnall