…my tears

The dance of the ages
is wild and free
feathers of flames
burn across sky and sea
the moon distils my tears
in emotional alchemy
she cloaks herself
in strange rings
as the tides shift
and the winds sing
and they hold her close
like a lover
when in truth, her lover
cannot be found

below in the gloom
the shadows sleep
shifting listlessly
in the dark corners
of the streets
from the wild woods
and the deep springs
there rises a distant song
soft, like the salty breath
of the distant sea
distant, in the same way
that your heart
remains distant from me

stars sweep the sky clear
of the remnants of clouds
as if searching
in fields of flowers
for a lover
who cannot be found
as I stand in the darkness below
my hands open like cups
to catch the overflow
my wings
drenched and dripping
now too heavy to fly
the weight pulls me
to my knees
down to the damp forest floor
where I huddle
with the trembling trees

the sky above is now still
an apparition
close enough to touch
if only I could move
in the moment
only the birds are shifting
only the birds can be heard
the moon is silent
in her seclusion
and perfume drifts in
from the sea

loneliness
my only companion
whispers so softly to me
strangely comforting
emptiness fills me
for seconds
I have a vision
of a shadowless sun
under which the thief of hearts
assails the souls of dreams
again, searching the night
for a lover
can never be found

dark flowers
bloom unseen
but their whispers call to me
in amethyst tones
they speak of impermanence
and the urgency
that comes with fading
fading into the endless void
into the dreaded season
of wild winds and raging rivers
where memories
are found and lost again
where the silence of the soul
is not peace, nor chosen
but a solitude
as deep as the ocean

where there is no sun
to reveal the hour
a place far from the winds
and the woods
where that unfound lover
is not there
in the roses of morning
for there will never be a dawning
blood and souls
have been sacrificed
and reality shifts
in and out of sight
now there is a deathly silence
through which there comes
a haunting call
only heard
by the ones who are free

it shifts again
slipping through
the trembling trees
and the wind flows
through my veins
cold as ice
where my blood used to be
this is the call of a lover
a lover never to be found
our shadows
will not see the sun
and the night
is now devoid of sound

the eyes of my heart
are closed
and the call of the raven
now circles the moon
his melancholy echoes reach
into the deepest crevices
of my soul
midnight shakes
her dark tresses
until they cover
every inch of light
the sky is broken
the stars have fallen
and the moon slips into the sea

colours painted over
black upon black
upon black
in this place
where no lover exists
tears fall unseen
into the ebony sea of night
the winds
are as silent as the tides
and the fragrance
of mist and magnolias
drifts in
from the starless graves
of the sky

your heart
is now so distant
like the waves
of the broken sea
and the songs
of the wild woods
they no longer serenade me
the eyes of darkness
look through
the heart of the night
searching
for the love in this place
this place
where no lover can be found

my poetry is built
upon the lost stars
and the cries of the souls
that drift back
from the distant sea
I try to remember the forest
I try to remember the trees
I try to remember the moon
but the shadows
are all I can see

In the dark
in the dark
in the dark
I search for my memories
for the angels
that looked over me
for the stars
that floated free
for the sun
that once warmed the sea
for the wind
that caressed the trees
for the rain
that kissed the wildflowers
for the moon
that transformed the night
for the place
where no lover can be found
for the dream
that my lover will find me
in the dark
in the dark
in the dark
© Ann Bagnall