…is testing my heart

Flames become embers, then ashes
the hearth cold and lifeless
I am drifting lost and listless
more disconnected with each passing day
time is testing my heart
I am on the precipice of the abyss
becoming unsubstantial
fear beating on the windows of my soul
the night is heavy with the weight of emptiness
an emptiness that roars through the catacombs of my mind
grief holding court in the silence
memories cascading down to me
the pathway to heaven is fading away
I am in the darkness now, a void that cannot be filled
a fleeting moment, holding my breath
traces of you clinging like the fragrance of flowers
in unexpected places
the morning awakens in shades of melancholy
her mournful wind weeping through the trees
igniting a whispering, in the last fading leaves
shades of winter are falling as she paints her soft colours
only the trees defy her brushstrokes
their barren branches starkly silhouetted against the sky
circular streams of smoke and mirrors
the sun casts no shadow in this pale chamber
the darkness distant and deep, delicately fading in the moment
drawing stones from my heavy heart
searching for the white in a mountain of black
the futility of hope in the face of an unrelenting force
the seasons turn over and over and each must run its course
© Ann Bagnall