…must be endured

I linger here in the desolate wilderness
that is now my new reality
forever lost, your distant heart
slow beats still sounding
in the otherwise silent void
your absence still casts a shadow
in stark, dark silhouette
a contrast to my bright, white solitude

sorrow is circling like birds of prey
it is only a matter of time
hope, a fragile mirage, reflected in a false mirror
an illusion promising water
in the endless reaches of an infinite desert
and I am drowning in a shore without a sea
I can no longer hear your heart

a cold wind whispers a song of sorrow
slowly weaving a path
through the leaves of unseen trees
walking between raindrops
something alights
feather soft upon my skin
a perception of warmth that I cannot feel
a sudden lightness of being

under the watchful eyes
of the ever distant stars
clouds are gathering in silent crowds
as the moon paints its masterpiece
heading towards midnight
everything hinges on this moment
the stark reality settles in my soul
and I surrender to my grief

just as the trees surrender their leaves
in the sudden onslaught of fall
in the knowledge
that winter must be endured
before spring can begin the healing
I surrender to the night
to the whispers calling to my heart
to the inevitable onslaught of memories

time can never heal my wounds
nor ever erase the traces of you
your essence courses through my veins
for you will ever be a part of me
as the scent of flowers after heavy rains
unseen but forever lingering
in the unreachable caverns of my soul
©Ann Bagnall