…into which I am gratefully falling

We have exhausted
every last vestige of hope
there is nothing left to hold on to
nothing left to lose

all is lost and even those parts of you
that once became a part of me
have now drifted so far away
that I can no longer feel
no longer see
even the shadow
of who we used to be

the currents of time
have pulled me out
into the aching sea
where the moon strolls slowly
as the earth spins around

and the tides ebb and flow
through my broken heart
filling the places
where you used to be

drifting away
from the moon and the stars
into the darkest corners
of the night

I am like an empty boat
adrift in uncharted waters
no captain to guide me
through the wild waves
that are crashing down
upon me

no crew to bail
the rising waters
from my hull
as one wave after another
I am feeling the weight
and slowly becoming
closer and closer
to that moment
that inevitable moment
when the waves will prevail
and my efforts will be to no avail

that moment
when the darkness above
and the darkness below
slide together like rich dark silk
that whispers seductively
as it winds itself
around every last pinprick
of light

it’s cool surface
a preview of the waiting depths
into which
I am gratefully falling

as if into a dream
where all sounds are muffled
and all sights unseen
and the gentle arms
of the aching sea
feel like home

and wave after wave
they comfort me
wave after wave
the darkness flees
wave after wave
my heart flies free
the balm of sky and sea

© Ann Bagnall

** A poem from my book ‘I Am The Mirror Empty Without You’ published on Amazon**